"If you don't want the dead coming back to life, why don't you just kill the living?"

Tarman's Rating:

Movie Review

This movie is just cool. For years I have searched for Cemetery Man, and finally, it was on one night on Bravo. Woo-Hoo! Anyway, it's the story of Francesco Dellamorte, the caretaker of the cemetery, and Gnaghi, his semi-retarded sidekick who likes to throw up on young teenage girls. For some reason or other, the corpses come back to life seven days after they are buried. Francesco and Gnaghi have to kill them when they rise. It's just another part of the job. The zombies themselves aren't the backbone of the movie though. They just make it cool. One day, Francesco sees the most beautiful woman he has ever seen (Anna Falchi), who is at her husband's funeral, and he puts the moves on her. He gives her a hot beef injection on her husband's grave later on and she is bitten by her recently returned husband. Dellamorte has to put a bullet in her head. This is where it gets weird. I really can't give you the full effect of the events that take place afterwards, but lets just say that he keeps seeing that same girl over and over again, a bus full of boyscouts and a couple of motorcyclists are killed in wreck and come back to cause some good old zombie havoc, Gnaghi falls in love with a talking severed head, and Francesco Dellamorte shoots a couple of nuns. The ending is a great way to cap off this mindbender, but I'm not going to tell you it. You just gots to see it. Cemetery Man is definatly one of the most innovative and original zombie movies to date. If you get a chance, wherever you are, rent it, buy it, or steal it. Just get a freakin' hold of it!